It’s a known fact that men can typically achieve orgasm easier than women. In fact, somewhere around 70% of women cannot orgasm from intercourse. Of course, there are those women who have no problem scaling the moan mountain to the climax and leaping off unscathed. (Go get ‘em, girl!) But if you are one of the many for whom the struggle of the climb rarely ends in ecstasy, let’s talk about a few ways you can get to the finish line with much more ease.
1. Turn off the internal radio feed
As women, our brains never stop going. We’re stressing about that presentation to corporate next Friday, deciding what to cook for dinner, or thinking about Rachel talking about her amazing new vibrator at wine night last week. For most of us, even something that should be stress-relieving, such as having sex, doesn’t even put an end to this. So, learn to turn it off. Take a couple deep breaths and focus on clearing your mind for foreplay, solo play, or sex.
2. Learn your body on your own time
Sex with a partner shouldn’t be a stressful time when you’re figuring out for the first time if you even like his finger there and his tongue over there. Take some time when no one is around to learn about you. Explore your lady parts and find out what feels good. Introduce yourself to a new toy and spend some quality time with you. Two wonderful things will happen: 1) orgasm and 2) orgasm. You can orgasm now while you’re playing with yourself. Then you can orgasm much easier next time he comes around. Why? Because you’ll be much more in tune with your goodies down there and now you can gently guide him on how to take you to PleasureTown.
3. Insecurities: Be-gone!
For the love of all things womanhood, get out of your own head, girl! When surveyed, over 90 percent of men replied that no, they literally NEVER pay attention to the chipping polish on your fingernails or that one ingrown hair that he would have to do a full body cavity search to actually find on you. He has his mind on much more important things like how to get you to the point where you are moaning and twitching. And hey, isn’t that what you want, too? So, stop freaking out about the fact that you didn’t thread your eyebrows before this sex sesh, and get into it. It literally makes NO difference to him, and you will reap the benefits.
4. One word: LUBE
For some reason, our generation has this misconception that you only use lube if you aren’t able to produce enough of your own natural lubricant. WRONG. Even if you gush like a rain gutter, lube can still be introduced in the bedroom as an additional stimulant to get you revved. Lube is not just a moisture-provider. Depending on which lube you choose, you can enjoy benefits from different flavors for oral play, different textures and thickness for friction, to just enjoying a damn good slip-and-slide time! (Some are even engineered to give you tingles and added sensations, so that’s awesome.) If you needed any more encouragement to try it, you should know that over 80 percent of users report more pleasure when they get lubed up and get going.
5. Turn your attention on your man candy
This may seem counter-intuitive, but spending some time on your man’s sweet spots and seeing him getting all hot and bothered at your touch will inevitably turn you on. There is nothing hotter than knowing you’re making him feel good. Bonus: when you turn your mind to pleasing your man, you’ll forget to worry about your own insecurities and greatly increase your likelihood of hopping on that non-stop train to climax-ville. Choo-choo!